How I discovered van life and found freedom - guest post Bird

The short story is that I lost my home and my bird rescue when COVID hit,  so I built my minivan to live in. I was rear ended and totalled my first trip out. With the payout I bought the skoolie then built it out myself. It was one of the hardest times of my life. I felt like I had lost everything. I was living with my daughter and grandkids and they moved in to their own place. I lost my bird rescue, my home, my daughter, and my grandkids. I thought it was the end of life. Then I found out about van life so I built the minivan and started working on myself, my anger, my trauma, my constant state of being a victim. The self work and the build taught me so much about myself. I had never done anything alone! Since being on the road I've had so many self discoveries. Just being alone in nature teaches you everything you need to know. The stillness, the quiet, the beauty all around you. The storms come to remind you that you could never truly enjoy the calm without having gone through the storms. I've been set free. I'm free from bills, I'm free from what society thinks I should do. I'm free to find myself without the influence of others. It's incredible, what I thought was terrible loss ended up being the very thing that set me free. I now get to take my grandkids on the road with me for two months out of the year. We homeschool and travel. The only thing I was missing was time for myself. Time to allow myself to heal and be who I want to be. As far as naturism goes, it's pretty new to me. I was headed home after spending 5 months work camping in Oregon. I planned to stop at every hot spring on the way home to pick up the grandkids for our visit. I had never visited hot springs outside of my own town before. I had done a lot of work on myself as far as feeling uncomfortable in my own skin and  worked on past sexual trauma. Prior to this I tried naturism. I did the world naked bike ride with friends. We had kayaked nude by moonlight, and hiked nude, but it always felt weird, The naked bike ride, the hiking and kayaking, it never felt right. I wasn't ready. I never had time to do the self work. I needed to do to be comfortable and to disassociate sex from being nude. Van life gave me that alone time to do the self work. It's the self discovery that van life has brought that has changed me. I think it's the lack of outside influence. Even though I do meet up with other van lifer's often, they are so open minded and they don't seem to judge. That's another reason I'm attracted to van life. The community is exactly the tribe I've needed.

When I arrived at the first hot spring, there were several in the area. I could take a short hike to and find the others pretty close by. I decided I wanted to try naturism. I spent 7 days there nude exploring, soaking, meeting people, cooking, camping, and finding another part of freeing myself. For the first time I was finally able to disassociate sexuality from nudity. After this discovery it seems so strange to see how weirded out people are by something so natural. Van life gave me the disassociation from people and societal norms. It gave me time without the influence of others, to make up my own mind as to what I wanted and what I considered ok and normal. That's why I always say that I'm trying to be a feral human. The farther I get away from what's expected as a part of society, or as a woman, etc, the better I feel. I'm tired of the expectations because of gender, social class, age, etc. It's literally all made up anyway.

Now, I make up my own morals and values based on what I learn from Mother Earth around me. I struggled with abandonment issues from being adopted. I realize now that Mother Earth is the only mother I need. She will never leave, she provides food, shelter, medicine, water, and everything we need to live. When we move close to nature we can see what truly needs our attention.

I also live with two disabled birds that are left over from the rescue. One is a pigeon and one is a rooster with brain damage. The rooster hikes, bikes, kayaks, and goes to work with me. I do work camping in Oregon 5 months out of the year, where I live outside the campground on forest land and kayak to work every day. Besides the birds I have a rescued dog and two rescued kittens. Bird Connect with me on Instagram Check out her videos on YouTube https://clothesfreelife.com/2023/03/how-i-discovered-van-life-and-found-freedom/?_unique_id=642458e734889